To Really Love a Wife - Cherish and Honor

The rewards of doing so will bring amazing blessings to your families. In today's society, we see sitcoms that show families living in perpetual acceptance of every circumstance in life in utter abandon regarding each other!

Remember the "Cosby Show," "Family Ties," "Leave it to Beaver," and "The Jetsons?" If only it really were like that in most of our homes--at least a good majority of the time. It can be!

Reality is not all thorns and ash for most couples I would like to believe, though that is a stretch if the divorce rate is any indication. Those sitcoms are out there too, the worst cases scenarios. No, we will not solve our problems in one thirty-minute episode, but we can learn to have better relationships with our spouses. You love your wife so you married her.

This advice presumes you are doing all that a decent human would do for another human regarding your spouse. Let's continue.

Let us define Cherish.

According to the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary, cherishing means to hold dear, feel or show affection, to keep or cultivate with care and affection, or to entertain or harbor in the mind deeply and resolutely.

We celebrate Valentine’s Day in order to show our cherish-ment each year in this Western Culture of ours and it is not enough. We are to cherish, hold dear, and think deeply and resolutely about our wives each day of the year.

If you ever think that you have cherished your wife enough husbands, ask her to see what she says. Be prepared to make a list of things that makes her feel cherished. They deserve it. We should remember that she gave up her family to become a member of a new family, which bears our last names. For doing that, for changing their identity because they love us so much, we should cherish them and hold them sacred.

Just so there are no misunderstandings, I DO NOT mean that we should own them or lock them away like some precious item. When we think about our wives, we should think constantly about what makes them happy and gives them pleasure. We should handle their emotions with ginger, carefully.

Our wives tend to be more expressive on certain matters than are we. We cherish them by considering what brings out the passion in them, both good and bad. We discover all of their weakness and flaws so that we can learn to accept them without judgment. We complement their strengths and count them a blessing as we use them together with our own strengths.

Let us define Honor - the verb honor and not the noun.

The verb honor is defined on Dictionary.com as the act of holding in high respect, treating with high respect, worshiping, or showing courteous regard, In other words, she comes first before all others. I take exception to worshiping her, but it should be pretty darn close! Only your deity should come with more honor than your wife!

I know that is a bold statement to make, but it is the truth.

Search your hearts and meditate on these things and you will find that you can only agree. We should be willing to open the door for her if she does not object. We should be willing to stand when she enters the room on occasion if she does not mind. We should be willing to allow her to eat first at meals--take the first bite of food before we eat if she does not object.

Notice I say that we should be willing to do these things if SHE Does Not Object! The worst thing that can happen is to hold your wife hostage every time she wants a door opened. The restroom does not count as one of those doors! If there is an emergency and she needs to flee, do not demand she let you open the door first--especially if you are the threat!

We honor them in action by the things we do in their presence.

Honor as a noun.

As a noun, honor is a title. Dictionary.com defines honor as a noun using fairness, integrity in one's beliefs and actions, a source of credit or distinction, high respect (as for worth, merit, or rank), such respect manifested, high public esteem, fame or glory as descriptors.

The only epitaphs we should give to our wives are those of honor and respect. This means we call them "Dear" and "Sweetheart" with only the sounds of love intoned in our voices or we just avoid calling them anything until we can!

Honoring our wives helps them to know their place in the marriage, which is right at our side as equal partners. Wife, the title, is one of honor just as Mother or Aunt or even Sister, mistress, miss and misses! We give these cultural designations to our women as a way to distinguish them from others.

Distinguish your wife from others. Honor that title as it applies to your wife. You love her. Make her know that you honor her position at your side. You speak of her in reverence and awe and marvel at the fact that she actually chose you to marry. She is more valuable than any other person on the planet. Let her know that she is the Queen of your life and waits for none!

Yes, it sounds romantic and out of a book of drama, but it should be true. We should esteem our wives to the point that they must give us permission to do other things. We can get there. We start by putting them first.

Seek this pattern of behavior. It will improve your life. Your spouse will be happier, and your children if any will be better off. For many of us, we are far from perfecting our relationship processes, but if we are willing to learn and forgive as we travel the road together as equals we will be happy in this life. If we are willing, all of us, we can overcome this trend of divorce and provide a better society for the next generation.